.Thursday, June 10, 2004 Y
*siGh*
I broke my own promise to myself. I called him again. *siGh* I found out he changed his hp number. I found out that he had blocked me in his MSN. The reason which I think is because he had put his hp number as his nick. I called him. He didn't wanna tell me abt the number. What can I do now? I didn't save the number even though I saw it. I respect his decision. But he promised me. He promised me that he will inform me abt his hp number changes, his address changes. Why? He broken them again. My tears flowed down again. I dunno. Why did I cry all over again for him? I told myself not to cry already. I promised him that i wun cry for him anymore. But why isit that my eyes still get wet and my tears still fall for him?
I'm feeling terrible now. I feel like a failure. What can I do to make myself happy and not think of him anymore? I really wanna forget him very much. But I cannot. I dunno why myself. I always get over relationships in about two months. But what happened now? Juz because he changed his hp number without telling me, i feel so depressed and sad and start to cry. Why am I doing all these to myself? Sufferring. Torturing. I had enough of all these. I wanna be happy. The me I used to be. All over again. But.. why can't I do it anymore? I used to be determined. but not anymore. I had enough of me all these while. Why isit that I find it so hard to change now?
waiting for you right here
6:30:00 PM
